I’ve never kept a journal.
BECAUSE I NEVER WANTED ANYONE TO FIND IT!
Anyone.
So basically this whole project scares me to death.
You’d think I’d be worried about the dailiness of it, the commitment (and I can see how that could shape up to be a real technical problem) but it’s the sharing I’m most afraid of.
And it’s not because I’m afraid people won’t like who I really am; I just don’t want people to know who I really am. And I don’t know why that is.
I don’t get scared often. That feeling where you can’t move and your brain and your skin are tingling and there’s a weight on your chest and you have no idea what’s going to happen next. That’s how I feel right now.
And I’m going after that beast.
~
I’m loving this project of yours – and well done for tackling this beast! I am also a writer who has never kept a journal and I’ve felt so guilty about not keeping one that I’ve never admitted it to anyone. Until right now! 🙂
Thank you, Louise. I really appreciate knowing there are people standing with me. So nice to know you!
like : )
Pam
Thanks for letting me know : )
I don’t journal either, though my writer’s notebooks might hint about what’s happening in my life, but only in a oblique way, only what I’m thinking about as life swirls on. That feeling you have, sounds like the best place – the DIScomfort zone!
Well, I wouldn’t say the best place… but I hear you. And really appreciate your support.
I, too, am among the writers who do not keep a daily journal. From time to time, I have kept what I call “daily writing.” It resembles a writer’s notebook but the practice has never stayed beyond a year, if my memory is accurate (BIG if). The beast you describe reminds me of my first two years as a blogger. The pursuit is worth it for the beast doth tame. Good for you, Cynthia.
Karen
Karen, it’s so great to hear from you. And it’s good to know I’ve got a chance. Thanks for your encouragement.
I’m starting to think this is going to be 365 reasons we are friends : )
Karen, if you were here, I really would hug you.
I am terrified with you. Too afraid to even comment on your first two posts. But focusing on the previous sentence with examples of the 3 twos just calmed me and cracked me up. Anyway, I’m so proud of you for “going after that beast.” xo
The fact that you are terrified with me makes me feel so much better. The power of two : ) Thanks, D. xo
and I have forever… only kept a journal…
putting myself out here… sharing my thoughts out loud…
IS a BHAG (Big Hairy Audacious Goal)… see wiki… 🙂
‘Lead on MacDuff’ !!!
I love it : ) Thanks, Helena!
Cynthia…
Thank you for receiving me… on the page…
’tis a privilege to participate…
for I have been following you…
throughout the past 365 days ++ … 🙂
Well, I’m so happy to know, and to know you.
Keep it up, Baby! I just cleaned out my office for the big move and found 10 journals with the first 10-15 pages filled in and then…nothing. Should I: Rip pages out and save in a folder? Keep journals and someday write in them, imperfect order, no real plan. Burn the whole damn pile and start fresh? I’m taking votes.
Jodi…
An all too familiar dilemma!!!
I continue to save mine…
for it is… what is not written…
that holds my attention… ~ 😉
Very interesting… If it were me, I would carefully rip out pages, staple, and put in a folder. Then donate the journals.
Cynthia, I think we have a good enough idea who you really are to want to know more 🙂 We’re here! You DO it, woman 😀
Donna, you are too sweet : )
Remember how often we used to say, “I’m like that, too!” Bingo re a journal. I also once stole letters I’d written to a former boyfriend, and then again a couple I’d written to a former friend, when the opportunities arose, b/c it killed me that they had private communications from me. I was so hoping I could leave this world without the slightest mark of my existence. And then I discovered I wanted to be a writer. Damn. But back to you: By going after that beast, you’re inspiring us all.
Yes, I do remember. I never even thought about stealing back letters… OMG, your sentence, I was so hoping I could leave this world without the slightest mark of my existence rings so true.