my writing notebook: the burning house

by | Aug 10, 2012 | craft of writing, details | 16 comments

Paul Lisicky
The Burning House
Etruscan Press paperback
2011

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On smell:

…her hair, which smelled of grapefruit and smoke. (35)

Practical, pleasant smells came off her skin: vaporizer, toothpaste, Vaseline Intensive Care. (43)

I loved their smells: laundry soap, herbal tea, patchouli, lavender. (47)

On sound:

She laughed, a quick quizzical laugh, down through her nostrils. If a honeybee could have laughed, that was the sound of it. (112)

On color:

The light outside the window went through stages: first the yellow of sugarless lemonade, then a pale, in-between color. Putty? Oyster? (92)

On adding depth to description by using contradiction:

Joan lay on the couch with an arm thrown over her face, a posture both carefree and desperate at once. (114)

If time could be sweetness, this was it. Sunday night, the sweetest night of the week. And lonesome too, slightly blue. All that work about to begin again, grinding and dull, on the other side of sleep. (49)

On perfect metaphors:

I lay back on the bench, still shaking in some deep basement of the self. (25)

She simply needed to gather the house around herself, and to head down the hall to her study. (36)

16 Comments

  1. Tracy Staedter
    Tracy Staedter on August 10, 2012 at 11:51 am

    I love this one>> “She laughed, a quick quizzical laugh, down through her nostrils. If a honeybee could have laughed, that was the sound of it.”

    Reply
    • Paul Lisicky
      Paul Lisicky on August 10, 2012 at 6:43 pm

      Thanks so much, Tracy. I’d forgotten I’d written that.

      Reply
  2. Dave Malone (@dzmalone)
    Dave Malone (@dzmalone) on August 11, 2012 at 10:16 am

    That first quote is a knockout. Love it: …her hair, which smelled of grapefruit and smoke. (35)

    Reply
  3. Darrelyn Saloom
    Darrelyn Saloom on August 11, 2012 at 4:53 pm

    I love all your chosen examples. But I physically felt the “shaking in some deep basement of the self.” (25)

    Reply
  5. Claire Guyton
    Claire Guyton on August 17, 2012 at 3:14 pm

    I have many times realized the need “to gather the house around [my]self” but would never have thought about in those words w/out that lovely quote. Now I will.

    Reply
    • Paul Lisicky
      Paul Lisicky on August 17, 2012 at 6:58 pm

      Thanks so much, Claire. Take care.

      Reply
  6. cynthia
    cynthia on August 19, 2012 at 9:44 pm

    Paul, you’re the best guest I’ve ever had. Thanks for responding here. Looking forward to Unbuilt Projects in October.

    Reply
    • Paul Lisicky
      Paul Lisicky on August 25, 2012 at 10:09 pm

      Thanks, Cynthia. It’s sweet of you to say that–both things.

      Reply
  7. Michelle Woollacott
    Michelle Woollacott on August 22, 2012 at 7:16 am

    Hi, I’m Michelle, a writer new to blogging, looking for great blogs to follow. This one is right up my street! Any similar reccomendations? Thanks, Michelle

    Reply
    • cynthia
      cynthia on August 22, 2012 at 4:57 pm

      Hi Michelle, check out Paul’s blog at http://paullisicky.blogspot.com. You can also try clicking on the names of the people who have commented on this post. And finally try clicking on the “click here” tab at the top of this blog. Thanks for leaving a comment.

      Reply
  8. Michelle Woollacott
    Michelle Woollacott on August 23, 2012 at 6:01 am

    Thank you I will check them out. These writing elements, using the senses, juxtaposition and imagery, sum up precisely the key elements I was taught during my three years at university. This is a great reminder of what a fiction writer should be focusing on in every short short story and in every chapter. Glad I found your blog!

    Reply
    • Paul Lisicky
      Paul Lisicky on August 25, 2012 at 10:09 pm

      Hey Michelle–it’s so good of you to write. Thanks for this comment. I hope you enjoy the blog, which I must get back to soon.

      Reply

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